Jacklynn Ruwethin
11/24/08
English 250-260
The Positive Power of Peer Pressure
We all know what peer pressure does to everyone. It is pressure that we feel from our peers to do certain things, dress certain ways, use certain words, eat certain food, and so on. We give in to others because we want to fit in or to be liked, not knowing that our behaviors may affect our level of success. People who are likely to give in to pressure are those who have low self-esteem, no self-confidence, few successful friendship, loneliness, and depression. Yet, peer pressure is not always bad. There is another side that we may have all experienced. It is known as the “positive” side of peer pressure.
Positive peer pressure is when your peers encourage you to do well in school or stop you from doing something wrong. It can be a powerful force to use to help others. For example, a friend of mine who did not wish to use his name said, “I was not the best student during my first year in college, and have done a lot of stupid things throughout the years. With the help of a friend who showed me some of my mistakes, I learned to change my ways and attitudes. I was lucky to correct my mistakes before it was too late.”
Usually, when we think of peer pressure, we think of something negative. Not many people know that using negative as well as positive peer pressure can help us. You may be able to change yourself for the better. Looking at what others do can help you bring about a positive change in your way of thinking. This positive influence can challenge or motivate you to do your best.
Some of your peers are your close friends, who do not pressure you to do things but rather inspire you to change yourself. They are people who believe in you, accept you for who you are, encourage you, and are always there for you. They do not seek to force, manipulate or control you. Nor would they judge you when you do something wrong.
Your other peers may actually persuade you to bring about a constructive change in your personality. Through their positive influences, they can teach you about drugs, sex, school etc. Peer pressure can lead you to make the right choices in life.
It is human nature to teach and learn from your peers. Karen Warren, an English teacher at Gavilan College said, “I see a benefit in peer pressure when older students or ESL students, who have already developed good study habits, set an example in the class, meaning they complete the reading and writing homework. They participate actively in groups so they’re desirable partners. If there are other students like this in class, their habits can rub off on others.”
As a college freshman you will face many challenges that will test your ability to make choices that may affect your future. Those choices include deciding on whom you want to hangout with. You spend so much time with your peers you-trust them and listen to them, so that sometimes it is hard to see that they are affecting you negatively.
I had a close friend who told me once that she was forced to smoke weed. She said, “I didn’t want to do it, but I didn’t want to back off, and let them think that I was too afraid to do it.” She made the mistake of thinking that not smoking would make her appear weak in front of everyone, which was unacceptable in her mind. Sometime later, I heard that my friend and those who smoked weed with her that very same week got in trouble and were suspended.
Sure, you may have heard people say that standing up for yourself and saying “no” will help you deal with peer pressure. But it is not easy; the rejection that follows is hard. You may lose confidence, feel isolated or feel like an outcaste. All of this negative image can lead to other things, such as drinking or using drugs. This then leads to dropping out of college. In these difficult times, you also need support from your families and friends.
As a freshman in college I have experienced both positive and negative peer pressure. I remember one time when I dreaded going to math class because I had a test. I was worried I might fail. I asked one of my recent friends for advice and he said, “Jeez! This is not high school, it’s college. If you don’t feel like going to class, then don’t. It’s not like you’re going to get suspended or something. If I were you I’d probably not go, I mean, why waste your time when you know you’re going to fail?” He left, and I just stood there near one of my classes trying to decide what to do.
I was still debating when one of my classmates from math class asked if I had studied for the test that day. I looked away and told her that I probably wouldn’t go to class. She asked me why, and I told her the reasons why taking the test wouldn’t do any good. She listened and after a moment told me that if I wasn’t ready to take the test yet, I should go ask our math teacher if I could reschedule and take it another day. I did what she said and felt good about my decision.
Experiencing peer pressure can be extremely challenging and distracting, but the choices we make will either help us or make us do things we might regret later on. Our choices about whom we associate with in college can influence our level of success. In addition, we need to develop self-confidence; self-acceptance and self-love, so that we can be comfortable with ourselves when faced with pressure from our peers.